Kiwi Tape Measurers
As seen on an unspecified task-based, master-led TV show!
Why buy your tape measure from some overseas conglomerate when you could buy it from us — a website that definitely exists for reasons entirely unrelated to a joke someone made on telly? Every tape measure on this site is 100% fictional and 100% proudly (fictionally) New Zealand-owned.
Why buy local?
Because Guy said so, and rather than argue the point, Paul just made up a fake website instead. That's basically an endorsement. We measure things. Long things, short things, things that were probably supposed to be measured before a task started rather than during it.